i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
