You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
