Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Randomize
