no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize