To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
