A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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