I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Randomize