Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
That's when you crack a 10am beer
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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