Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
