maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize
