Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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