i wish there were pregnant emoticons
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
