Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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