Is it normal to miss your booty call?
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
