At least make sure they are 18
Why
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
