people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
