allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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