Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
