He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
