oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I think pants incapable of making pants work
My bed smells like the plague
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