Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
