i just google imaged poop.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
