She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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