It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
