Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm

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(505): View more from New Mexico

Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems

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(425): View more from Washington

her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.

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(229): View more from Georgia

You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru

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(514): View more from Quebec

You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club

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(647): View more from Ontario

You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics

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(716): View more from New York

The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.

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(706): View more from Georgia

I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want

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