Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
