i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize
