Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
