You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
