Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
