he wants to bone in the snuggie
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
