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• (516): View more from New York

  gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long

  (917): View more from New York City

  Thats what she said

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."

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• (214): View more from Texas

  I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.

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• (972): View more from Texas

  85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  i would one night stand the shit outta him

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• (415): View more from California

  he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"

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• (760): View more from California

  Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.

  (818): View more from California

  That was one of the best texts I got today

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.

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