yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
