I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
You were trust falling into bushes
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
