I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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