I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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