You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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