I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
