Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Randomize
