Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
So squirting runs in the family.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
