We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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