Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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