I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
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