you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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