I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
