my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
