You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
