I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
