i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
