it hurts more in the daytime
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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